Archive for November, 2011

The Bucket Of Shame

Posted: 29th November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized

You never forget your first puker. Within a month or two of starting this job, I got a call to a tavern nearly an hour after bar close, so I assumed I was getting a waitress or some other staffer. The parking lot is almost deserted of cars, but there is a young guy standing […]

Completely Non-Sequitor- Call Of Duty

Posted: 22nd November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized

I’m not a game player, but I love the ads for the Call Of Duty games. I saw this once on TV and had to go find it… I’m posting here mostly so I can find it easily… it features Sam Worthington (Terminator: Salvation) and Jonah Hill (Superbad), with a quick cameo by Dwight Howard […]

Flashback: The Skankopottomus

Posted: 18th November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

I got a call to a bar on a hot, humid, and muggy summer nite, and there are two girls sitting in the parking lot. This is always a bad sign; any time I pick up someone that is sitting on the asphalt, they are invariably really wasted. They get up and start weaving toward […]

Vignette: The Woman In The Parking Lot Of The Tittie Bar

Posted: 17th November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized

In theatrical script writing, sketch stories, and poetry, a vignette is a short impressionistic scene that focuses on one moment or gives a trenchant impression about a character, an idea, or a setting, and sometimes an object. -Wikipedia I turn in to cruise the parking lot of a tittie bar at closing time, and I […]

You went out to the bar Friday night a few weeks ago, knowing full well that you would be an obnoxious wasted moron by closing time, so you called my taxi company to take you there. A safe, courteous, and professional driver took you to the bar, and because that driver likes to hang out […]

Roadkill: Part Two- Rump Roasts And Roadkill

Posted: 12th November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized

In the immortal words of Ron White, “I told you that last story to tell you this one…” My rather churchy and God-fearing wife sees the hand of the Lord in the most mundane of everyday events, even something like having dollar-off coupons on the very day that Publix has a two-for-one sale on three […]


Posted: 11th November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized

A couple weeks ago, my mother in law was over visiting her granddaughter, and when she went outside to get something out of her car, and she said, “Hey, there’s a dog out on your porch…” And in a very “Corporate-American escalate-problems-up-the-ladder-and-get-this-shit-off-my-desk” mentality, my hunnee went outside, quickly surveyed the situation, and called out to […]

Alternate title: “Its Like Needles Come Through Grapes Now, And I Refuse To Eat Two Thousand Beans To Build Trust In These Crazy Cyborgs.” I’m trying to not put too much political content in here, but frankly, I’m a politics junkie, so it is going to come out occasionally. Obama is an abject failure, and […]

Halloween ho’s…

Posted: 1st November 2011 by Taxi Hack in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

Halloween was kinda disappointing for me… oh, I got the usual parade of drunks and slutty babes, but now that I am blogging this, I was really hoping for a truly great Halloween story, but I didn’t get one. But then again, if you don’t drive a taxi, you don’t have a clue just how […]